Dear Fearless,

We met a few times before the books came out so I know you know what I look like but I don't think we spoke much 'cos I was chasing smells and you were busy stopping your man from losing his ball. What would they do without us eh? So, I'll start by telling you a bit about myself - the things I like doing and what I'm good at and stuff.

I've already mentioned the smells. I am absolutely fabulous at picking up a scent and tracking things. My favourite smell is easily the tennis ball - it makes my mouth water just to think of it! I love going to other people's houses because they keep tennis balls in funny places. I found one under a cooker once. We went to another house where they had a big garden full of bushes and I found seventeen balls in those bushes. Wooo-hoo-ooo, that was a good haul!

The other thing I like is food. I like chicken, beef, lamb and turkey - well, all meat really. Have you ever had a salami? It's a big sausage. I had whole one once - I think maybe it was my birthday because they put it on a special plate which they usually keep for themselves. It was high up on a table which made it fun to get - you know like a party game. It was a shame though because, unfortunately, I didn't get the game properly and they were all upset to miss seeing me do it. Anyhow if you ever get the chance to get your teeth into a salami don't hesitate for a second - it's delicious!

Something I'm not very good at is sitting on human furniture. I've been trying for years now but I know I've still not got it right because if they see me they get cross and say "No no no, get down!". These days I wait until they go out before I get some practice in.

Well, I'd better go now. There's a very nice patch of sun on the other side of the room and I have to go and lie down in it. Write soon old buddy.

Love and a lick,
Dave
x  

P.S. As well as doggy things I particularly want to hear about your advances in bio-molecular matter transfer... oh, and how long it took you to become a concert pianist?